That's Mucus to My Ears...

'Round these parts, one can hear the incessant sniff snifffffffffff followed by that unmistakable honking call of the Rhinovirus Congestiae bug (yeah, I made that up, but it sounds good--so go with it).

It's come to roost at my house...for that matter, it's come to nest...not ON my head, but IN my head.

I imagine it looks sort of like this (but a bit puffier and more...slimy).

I've never actually seen it but I just KNOW this is what the evil creature looks like. It has multiple arms to grab hold and not let go. It's zombie green with lovely spots of aubergine. And it's not alone. It brought friends. LOTS of friends. They make my voice sound like George Burns after 100 years of smoking cigars. So I wrote a poem which I have titled: Rhinovirus Congestiae (because that's what I do...write poems).

Rhinovirus Congestiae

by Torrey

A visitor came calling the other day
his intentions, I think, were pure evil.
His name is Rhinovirus Congestiae.
He was tiny and looked like a weevil.

He has three pairs of legs (or maybe they’re arms)
And a big toothy grin he keeps flashing.
He may look quite odd (but that's one of his charms)
and his aubergine spots are quite smashing.

It was right then and there, I made the mistake
I invited him in for a visit.
He slithered right past me (just like a snake)
I should have known then...I admit it.

He brought his whole family (and most of his friends)
…they rolled in like a thick bank of fog
Now they’re happy and thriving and doing backbends
…and I’m lying here sick as a dog

While this may sound amusing,  It's SNOT funny to me.

I've gathered my arsenal and am combating (which I think really SHOULD be spelled combatting) these unwanted guests: nasal washes, fluids, vitamin C, nebulizer treatments, rest and Kleenex...LOTS of Kleenex.

I raise my glass of Nyquil in a toast to my victory.

I WILL win.